Field report from Lima (Callao), Peru

"The SOS Social Centre opened my eyes to the future"

SOS Children believes that the family is the best natural environment for a child to grow up. In so doing, the SOS Family Strengthening Programmes available throughout the world seek to avoid the separation of the family and help them become independent. This story higlights the support of the programme to the families of a local community.

Mercedes is a courageous woman who, one day, lost the direction in her life and was also about to lose her family. Today, after years of distress and suffering, she has learned that thanks to SOS Children, there is an opportunity to reunite her family.

After finishing secondary school, she continued her studies at a local higher educational institution in Lima where she obtained the title of a nurse. Later, she found a job at the Clinica Maison de Sainté and, soon afterwards, at the Hospital Arzobispo Loayza.

One day, she met a young man, Anibal, to whom she got married. They had a child: a very beautiful baby girl whom they named Fabiola. Until then, they were a happy family, living at the house of Mercedes's parents.

"I remember that it were my mother and my sister who used to take care of my little Fabiola while I went to work. Anibal was also working in the hospital, as a cleaner, so we did not have time to take care of the baby," says Mercedes. "After a few years, Anibal was dismissed and, as he could not find a job, he worked with his father helping him at his bakery. He did not feel well, so, as I had saved some money, we decided to by a 'kombi' van car for public transportation. He was happy and started to work immediately."

First problems at home

Mercedes was working fulltime at two different institutions; Anibal was working as a public driver. Fabiola was six and it was Mercedes' sister who took care of the child most of the time. One day, the sister complained: "Look Mercedes. It doesn't mean I don't want to take care of little Fabiola, but I think you are neglecting your child from enjoying her family, which is not fair for her, and not even for you. I think it is time you consider dedicating more time to your daughter."

Feeling strongly touched by the sister's words, Mercedes stopped working fulltime. What is more, they moved to live with Anibal's father. Terrible choice! "Everything was fine until the father passed away," relates Mercedes. "Anibal's brothers and sisters, including his mother, arrived, and the problems began. They made our living miserable. It was just impossible to stay there. Anibal was tired, too, and we started to fight. He became very aggressive. He did not come home and I just couldn't bear his family. I decided to go away. My family knew nothing about it. I felt ashamed to tell them."

Homeless, Mercedes remembered she had bought a little land in a poor neighbourhood several years ago. That was the only place she could go. "It is a small land where I built a single room with plant mats. The floor was soil only. We slept tight in a single bed in order to reduce the effect of the cold at night. In the neighbourhood, there was no one we knew," relates Mercedes.

After a few months, Anibal showed up and we lived together again. He had no job. Something had happened to the car. Mercedes was going to work while Anibal stayed at home taking care of little Fabiola; until one day. Mercedes was out and, during her absence, Anibal took little Fabiola to Mercedes's mother. Anibal had gone away and left the child with the mother.

As Mercedes received a phone call from her mother, she went to her mother's place to pick her daughter up, but Fabiola didn't want to go with her. "It is then when I lost my daughter and my husband," remember Mercedes with tears in her eyes. "I asked Fabiola over and over again to come back home with me, but she did not want to...I was destroyed."

One day, while Mercedes was living alone, Anibal showed up again, and as she was rather vulnerable, she accepted him. Next Mercedes was expecting her second child. But the story was repeated. Anibal disappeared and left Mercedes several months pregnant. Soon Mercedes learned that Anibal was going out with another woman.

"It was the worst experience of my life," she says. "I cried and cried without consolation. I felt trapped in my own room and I just wanted to die. Fortunately, the woman who had told me about Anibal's cheating came to rescue me. Everyone calls her "mamita" (kind mother). She was well-known in the neighbourhood for her support to women in need. Indeed, she took care of my little Jesus after he was born. She did it for almost six months."

At the SOS Social Centre

One day, when little Jesus was about six months, "mamita" spoke to her: "I want to tell you something, Mercedes. Please, don't misunderstand. I have no problem taking care of little Jesus while you go to work, but children need more attention than what I can offer him. He needs more stimulation in order to grow up independently. So, my daughter Milagros leaves my grandchildren in the SOS Social Centre in Callao. It is a nice place for children. Please, allow me to take little Jesus to the day-care of the centre. I can take him in the morning, and you can pick him up when you come back from work in the afternoon. What do you think?"

Mercedes just said that she would think about it. But "mamita" was extremely fast. One day, she had taken little Jesus, together with Milagros children, to the day-care. In the afternoon, as Mercedes was back, "mamita" told her: "Mercedes. Jesus is at the social centre. He is waiting for you."

Mercedes could not believe it.

"When I arrived at the centre," says Mercedes, "I met Ivonne, the social worker who kindly talked to me about the centre and explained what support is given to mothers in need. Next I met Jessica, the teacher of my little Jesus... The place was shiny and well organized. I was simply amazed. Children of different ages were playing in different, beautifully arranged classrooms, and there was Jesus, playing joyfully with toys. Of course, I was happy to have come across such a good place and nice people."

"Jesus has attended the social centre since then and he has learned a lot," Mercedes relates. "During that time, I met different helpful people at the centre. I myself attended several workshops and talks where women learn about many important things. For example, I learned about nutritious food for my son, how to organize myself, and, for me, the most important thing, how to become independent and self-sufficient. I was taught how to give value to the things I have done and, in so doing, raise my self-esteem. It is just a great place where people care for you."

In the meantime, Mercedes was offered a scholarship to make a diploma in the area of motherhood. One more time, the social centre supported the woman giving her the chance to take care of her son during the day, until she finished her work and studies. As Mercedes accepted the challenge, the baby practically stayed the whole day at the day-care.

"During these years, I have worked very hard, both going to work and studying. I feel tired, but I am almost finished. Within months, I will finish my dissertation and I will be able to spend more time with my son. I feel grateful to the social centre, because without their support, I would probably be living with my old problems or … who knows."

Reuniting the family

Today, Mercedes and Jesus are still living in the same neighbourhood. Her house, however, has improved a lot: the walls are not plant mat anymore; they are brick. The floor is fine cement and their house is bigger.

Besides that, Anibal is back. Mercedes, though, with the careful advice of the social centre, asked Anibal to attend the workshops of the centre if he wants to come back. Anibal accepted and today he feels repentant for his mistakes. In the meantime, Mercedes is still hopeful that her daughter Fabiola will soon be back to her family.

"Mamita" is still there to support her and they are almost like sisters. On the other hand, Mercedes has made a promise, to dedicate her diploma to the co-workers of the SOS Social Centre Callao. She says: "They have all helped me to be here today. My son's teacher, the social worker, the psychologist, who 'opened my eyes to the future', all of them helped to believe in myself and in a united family again. I think I am close to that moment. Hopefully my dear Fabiola changes her mind and learns to value this family."

SOS Children has been working in Peru, caring for orphaned and abandoned children, since 1975. There are eight unique children's villages (Arequipa, Callao, Chiclayo, Cuzco, Esperanza, Huancayo, Rio Hondo and Zarate) which help give around 1,000 children a family for life. The SOS Social Centre at Callao supports roughly 800 children and their families in the local community through day care services, and helping families with income generation projects.

You can support children in Peru by becoming a child sponsor.