Interview with an SOS Mother from the Czech Republic

The SOS Children's Village in Doubí, a suburb in the spa town Karlovy Vary, was opened in 1970. Here, we interview Vladimira, an SOS mum who joined the Village in 1990.

How and why did you join the SOS Children's Village?

At that time I worked at Prague Castle [as assistant of the former Eurohouse director whose tasks involved early preparations for the Czech Republic to join the EU], and this was where I found out about SOS Children's Villages. Almost instantly I knew I wanted to work in a social care setting, so that is basically why I decided to apply for a job. It was all about what you are looking for in life, what you want to do; I felt that helping, and working with children was my goal in life.

The only thing that was difficult about the decision were the personal restrictions at that time - mothers could not be married, could not have their own children or bring their partners with them to the village (these restrictions are not in force anymore). Nevertheless, the idea convinced me: mother and children, a small house in a village. This was very different from the Soviet-style orphanages, which had two to three educators and 50 children in a big house.

How many children do/did you have in your care and what are they doing?

Lada is 25, she graduated from child education high school; 22-year-old Katka finished the textile-industry and design school, 19-year-old Maria will be a shop-assistant; 18-year-old Oldrich is learning to be either a waiter or a cook; 16-year-old Zdena is studying at the police school and 15-year-old Petra is finishing 9th grade and she would like to continue her studies at the health high school and become a nurse. Lada and Katka live outside the SOS Children's Village. Both of them have boyfriends and full-time jobs, and both of them continue to improve their education and occupational skills. I am happy that they are doing fine; they study and have their own goals in life. I am proud of them and proud that I raised them. So, I do not regret that I had to give up on my own hypothetical children and husband. This is all I need - to see that they are doing fine. We are a family. The older ones are working and we do not meet a lot but they always visit at Christmas or special events. We are a family. We call and we help each other. This makes me happy.

In the process of upbringing children, you have to regard each child an individual and develop their individual skills, and you have to encourage them to develop their skills. This is important so that they grow up to become self-confident persons. It would not be possible without the support provided by SOS Children's Villages, both in economic terms and aspects of professional help.

I have tried to teach the kids to work - they had to have a part-time job during the summer so they would learn how to work. There isn't always someone there to help them. They have to learn to take care of themselves.

The new thing here is that children learn not only to receive, but also to give back, which is something that was not the case in the past. They visit old people, decorate their houses before Christmas, and visit them a couple of times a year. This can take them further in life.

What gave you the strength to carry on for 17 years?

There were no serious problems with the children. Little things - when children request a song for you on the radio - make me happy. We have a really good relationship, now we are more like partners. We can talk about everything and the relationship is so fulfilling. That keeps me happy.I have lots of friends and we visited them a lot, so we were not locked in here. I thought I had to be the role model for them and develop as a person, so that the children would see the world in very different ways, that they could see the options - in culture, in sports.The most important thing is to be a mother. For example, 16-year-old Zdena still comes to my room; we hug, lie down and talk about different things. This is the most important thing - to have a close relationship. Being a family is the most important.

What does the future hold for you?

I am about to graduate from university and most of the children are ready to leave. I will be at the crossroads soon - I might take in new children or I could help children with all my skills and experience in some other way. I do not know yet, it is a big decision. My main concern is that the surrogate family care system is not working well in the Czech Republic. I think I know where the problem lies, so I am considering contributing to developing the system. The main problem is that we still have big orphanages which do not function as families, but as institutions. Many children end up in those orphanages, but maybe they should not be there. Most of the children who grow up there will end up producing children who end up in the same orphanages. It is not their fault, they just do not know any better. This is a vicious circle we have to break.

The solution would be having new family-type institutions with a different approach towards biological parents. The work with biological parents is not working here and we have to improve it. If the biological family is weak and socially deprived, it is not able to provide the children with all social skills needed. Here is the challenge for us [for social child educators]: we have to co-operate with the biological parents, educate their children and develop their personalities, so that they can stand their ground in life. For this, we need money and professional people.